Happy Escape the Womb Day to ME!!
It’s my birthday! Halfway to 90! I used to go to lunch with this guy you’re going to hear about next week, and I would tell him my plan for after my kids left of getting in shape and how my life was going to start when my last kid graduated and I’d start going out and dating and how great it was going to be. Well, that seemed like a million years away, and here we are, two years from it. And I’m not in shape, I haven’t gone out, and I’m somehow going to have to get rid of this asexual vibe I’ve been working on for the last 15 years or so and start getting my flirt on. What if my flirt is too strong? Doubt it.
Birthdays are so interesting. I’m celebrated for not doing anything but springing forth from the womb. I should have three birthdays a year when I gave birth to my girls and my mom should be celebrated today.
Adam Carolla says instead of birthdays you should have an Achievement Day you celebrate. It can be self-decided, something you’re really proud of, the day you get your Master’s Degree, the day you achieve a goal, like spelling achieve right, in my case. I don’t have one of those yet. I haven’t done anything with my life that I’m overly proud of, except raise amazing kids. Maybe my Achievement Day will be when Tenderheart finishes college and walks across that stage, maybe it will be when I finally decide what I want to do with my life. I have no idea. On what date would you want your Acheivement Day?
Until I figure mine out, I’ll be accepting cards and letters every year on June 11th, because that’s the day I received an eviction notice from my mother’s uterus.
My sister looks less than thrilled.