With Valentine’s Day Right Around the Corner

I’ve written very little about my daughters’ dating lives. One, because they don’t have much to talk about (thank God), and two, because I’m not one of those moms that gets too involved in their dating lives….at least that’s what I thought.


For my new reader, Sunshine has dated exactly one boy who was in the play last year and he was the worst boyfriend ever in that he wasn’t very attentive, or capable of using a phone.  There’s been one other boy sniffing around, a term I hate but have used anyway, and he confessed his undying love just as bad-boyfriend-Wilson was asking her out.  She chose Wilson (again, thank God) and the other boy got mad and went away, sort of.  He’s still around but more in a friend capacity rather than interested in dating her.  And here’s why I’m doing so much thanking God, it’s because potential boyfriend number 2 (PB2) is intense.  You know the guy, the one that is in love immediately after you start “dating”.  And no one dates anymore, it’s all just hanging out and changing your Facebook status, you know what I mean?

Anyway, PB2 posted on his most recent girlfriend’s wall, Happy one month anniversary, and here’s to a million more months….dang it, I tried to find it by Facebook stalking like I normally do, but it’s gone.  Come on, people, stop being so private, I need something to blog about.  Anyway, my girls don’t need that much intensity.  And how many more months does a million take you to?  I mean, really, are you going to remember her name in 5 years?  This is exactly three months after the previous girlfriend he “loved” and bragged about sleeping with.  I’m going to throw in another “THANK GOD” that he didn’t date Sunshine.

So let’s move to Moonshine.  Last summer and the first part of the school year, she had an intense boyfriend that I really liked.  He lived pretty close and I let him come over quite a bit because I wasn’t letting her go over there unsupervised.  He went to dinners with us and movies and he hung out a lot.  Adam broke up with Moonshine to date other girls.  Then they got back together and she broke up with him because he wanted another “break”, presumably to date more other girls.  I actually took it harder than Moonshine.  She was over him but I’d gotten used to having him around and he was a nice guy.  But he really was too intense.  He told me he was going to marry her one day and I said, If you’re around when she turns 25, you can have her with two cows and a sheep.  What are we, in the early 1900’s?  And even with all that intensity, he didn’t last 6 months.  I wonder a lot what people think.

The next guy she dated had really weird family issues and right before she broke up with him, another boy, an INTENSE one professed his undying love for her.  Oh Lord, here we go.  He actually got mad at her because she said they were just friends, but she’s a little like the monkey in that she’s charming and flirty without even really realizing it.  Between Sunshine’s inability to flirt and Moonshine’s inability to not flirt, there might be the perfect balance.

And here’s my point, my kids need to get out of here and live big lives.  My biggest fear is that Sunshine is going to meet someone this summer and chuck her college plans because he’s the ONE.  I’ve told them for years that they’re not going to meet the man they’re going to marry in middle school, in high school, or in Aurora, Colorado. They need to go to college or travel and have experiences and not get tied down thinking of the what-ifs.  Don’t ask me how I know.

Tenderheart said she wants to join the Peace Corp and I said, Yes, do it.  Can you do it now?  That would be so exciting because she has a missionary’s heart and a love for teaching.  Now, she thinks she wants to be a social worker and travel the world when she has a family, which in my opinion is almost impossible and crazy expensive.  I want her to have semesters abroad and do all that traveling when she’s young.  No one listens to me.  Why does no one listen to me?

Sunshine just got accepted to the University of Maryland and while my first inclination is to tell her it’s ridiculous and will be impossible to afford, every other part of my being wants to help her make it happen.  She will need almost a full ride scholarship so she’s retaking her ACTs next weekend, but it’s doable.  It’s a 26 hour car ride plane ride away, and I don’t know how I would handle that, but I want her to go into the world and the fact that they accepted her with about a 41% acceptance rate is just amazing.

In closing, to all intense boys, please stay away from my girls.  I understand that YOU, dear reader, are probably semi-happily married to your high school sweetheart and everything worked out for you.  What I’m saying is it isn’t the norm in today’s society and I will also not be giving out two cows or a goat when they do get married.  And have you seen any of these wedding reality shows?  People are paying more for their weddings than I make in a year, that’s ridiculous.  What do people think?


1 Comment

  1. I’ve told EVERY KID I KNOW for years…at the VERY least, save up enough money to get there and go out to a beach somewhere for 3 months, living in some little hotel with a couple of friends you drag into the dream and have some crap little job that just gets you through the summer but you have an experience of a lifetime. Or for my nephew it was get a summer job on a ranch in Wyoming, far, far from home and spend some time in the world. Once you are IN the grown up world, you just can’t.
    “In everyday life, there’s just no way…to be out of hand…”
    No one listens to me either…

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