Happy (The) Vow-lentine’s Day!

See what I did there?  Yeah, it’s a movie review of The Vow, which we saw Saturday night after church and a drive-thru dinner at Chick-fil-A where they got my order wrong.  I love CFA and it’s never happened before, but I’ll obviously be checking in the future.  Side note:  I could never work there.  I would be popping nuggets all night and then buttons all day.  I also couldn’t work at Cold Stone, although I’d have amazing arms with all that ice cream mixing.   

Reminder, until I can think of something better, my rating scale is Your Baby’s Ugly, and by “baby”, I mean movie; and by “ugly”, I mean terrible.  I’m working on something else, but “two enthusiastic feet up” just sounded dirty.

So Happy Made-up Hallmark Holiday, or whatever your belief system is.  Here’s what I know about it, if I see Moonshine moping around one more minute because some loser hasn’t asked her to be his Valentine, I’m going to scream.  People annoy me, hearts annoy me, life’s been pretty annoying lately, although it’s better than the alternative….death.

On a happier note, we went to see The Vow.  Two movies in two nights, what are we, royalty?  Oh I know.  And that only made sense if I was posting these reviews in order, but spoiler alert, we went to see The Woman in Black Friday night, but it didn’t seem like a good Valentine’s Day blog so it will post tomorrow.  Yeah, I’m fancy like that, I know how to schedule.

So The Vow.  Sunshine skipped church to hang out with her friend, which I don’t know if I’ve named before, but let’s call her Mariska.  She’s one of Sunshine’s really good friends and lives in the neighborhood so comes and hangs out a lot.  Sunshine sprung it on me so Moonshine and I went to church, got CFA, and came home to get them for the movie.  I went back to the HARKINS, which you can read about HERE.  I thought it would be okay since it was a 9:35 start and felt like people might have more sense, but they don’t as everyone started shushing a toddler about halfway through the movie.  I don’t know when I started being the judgment police, but hey people, let’s start using some of the good stuff.

So The Vow, do you feel like I might be stalling?  I like Channing Tatum and you can be SURE I’m going to be doing a review of his new movie about male strippers, Magic Mike, and I also really liked him in Dear John, although the movie not so much.  Sunshine and Mariska were watching The Notebook when I got home so we were in a romantic movie mood.  We’re also big Rachel McAdams fans, although I don’t know that you can beat the chemistry between her and Ryan Gosling.  Mmmmm….  But Channing Tatum tried and I believed it.  I can’t really put my finger on what I didn’t like, but I left feeling a little empty.  So did the people behind me who recapped everything that was happening down to the car he was driving (a SAAB).

I should go back a bit.  The Vow is the story of Paige and Leo, whose name I just had to look up because it left no lasting impact, and their undying love, but pretty forgettable when they’re in a car accident and she thinks he’s the doctor.  She hasn’t spoken to her family in 4 years and there’s some secret that no one’s telling her.  I was trying to think of something that would keep me from talking to my family for 4 years, and what it ended up being didn’t seem so severe, but maybe that’s just my expectations.  I actually don’t know what it could have been to make the non-talking for 4 years believable.  I mean my dad didn’t talk to me for months because of my choice in boyfriends, not the monkey, but that wasn’t Paige’s problem. 

Anyway, Leo tries to start wooing Paige who thinks she’s engaged to someone else, who’s a complete tool.  Spoiler alert.  I don’t know how long it would have taken me to fall “back” in love with Channing Tatum, because I was in love after the trailer, so not too long.  It took her a little longer (or never, I’m not spoiling it).  I can’t imagine forgetting chunks of my life, although sometimes I wish I would, but specific things, not 5 straight years like she did.  So they were a cute quirky couple that lived in a fabulous apartment in downtown Chicago, who went to a super cute little cafe for hot chocolate and candy, but you’ll have to see for yourself if they lived happily ever after, or you can research who the movie was about and there’s a huge spoiler for you.

All in all, I’d say Your Baby’s Just Adorable!  But take the crackers because it’s a cheese fest.  And I wouldn’t see it again, or buy it, but I’m glad we saw it if only for the fact that Channing Tatum made it into my dreams that night and I couldn’t say the same for Daniel Radcliffe the night before, or thankfully, the Woman in Black.


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