We Are All More

Okay, we’re already five days into this year. Let’s get this thing going.

I’ve been thinking a lot.  The first of the year does that to me.  Did you know that the first Monday of a new year is the biggest day for divorce filings?  In 2007, I was in line to file mine.  It’s sad really.  I had a comment last month from someone with a blog name of Divorce Encouragist.  I’m sure she has her own reasons, but I can’t imagine, unless of course there’s abuse, encouraging a divorce.   I think I might be going through the anger phase of mine right now though.  I have to stop wasting my life.

But really, how dare you go and have a good life.  How dare you leave me and all my awesomeness.  I mean, really, you should have left me and had a miserable life, how dare you not.  Okay, I’m done; and yes, I realize my ridiculousness. 

On New Year’s Eve I was thinking about all our New Year’s Eves of days gone by.  Like the Y2K scare where we all held our breath at midnight to see if the “grid” was going to go off or whatever the scare was.  I went to my mom’s that year and our whole family was there playing darts and just hanging out.  It was so much fun; and as I’m sure you remember, nothing actually happened.  Can you believe that was over 10 years ago?  Seems like a whole other life.  I’ve also been thinking about wasted time.  How much of my life has been spent unhappy or unfulfilled.   All my resolutions not kept, all the years I’ve just wasted waiting for something, but not quite knowing what it is.

I have a friend.  It’s not you.  She never thought she could be happy alone.  She was always desperate for some guy to step into a relationship that had just ended.  Desperate.  She was an unwed mother with a string of bad relationships and now her daughter is a very young unwed mother currently in her first bad relationship.  It’s a pattern.  I mean, I’d like a relationship as much as the next gal, but not to the point that I even want to subject my kids to meeting a string of guys.  Or to have them think I can’t stand on my own and then think they can’t stand on their own.  Basically I’d like to raise strong, independent girls that don’t need a boyfriend every second of their lives like so many of their friends think they do.  Of course I want them to have relationships and marriages and children, all of it.  But stand on your own first and figure out who you are without worrying about being something for someone else.

You might remember (or not) THIS POST where I talked about my new favorite song, I’m Forgiven by Sanctus Real.  I have two new favorites right now.  The first one is Come Home by Luminate and You are More by Tenth Avenue North.  Okay, one more and it’s I Am New by Jason Gray, which you can get for free on www.KLOVE.com.  And I wouldn’t be a full service blog if I didn’t put a video on here.
This is Come Home by Luminate: And you can also find a video of the adorable lead singer explaining the meaning.
And here’s You Are More by Tenth Avenue North: 

People are so freaking talented. I need to find my talent.

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2 Comments

  1. Amber

    lets call her bamber says: his life would suck without your awesomeness lady and you better remember that!!!! I agree tho, stop wasting your life and lets go man hunting!! 🙂

  2. I appreciate you posting this, because it’s helpful for me to think today about enjoying all the moments of today — letting go of worry and living well. xoxo gfaith

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